Dealing With People Who Hate You: What You Can Do Right NOW!

Not everyone will like you: Be proud of those that don’t.

You will make enemies on your journey to WOW leadership. In fact, if you don’t have a few people upset with you I know you haven’t made the tough decisions and taken action when needed. As a leader you will be forced to fire people and make decisions that aren’t liked. You must be strong enough as a leader to make the right decisions and not simply take the easy option.

I prefer the word DISLIKE to HATE, however, there are those haters out there that can upset and frustrate.  You need to know how to handle the haters.

Effective leadership is not about making speeches or being liked; leadership is defined by results not attributes. - Peter Drucker

Politicians try hard to get their constituency to like them. Even then most elections are won by narrow margins and with only about 51% to 58% of the vote. What this means is that a large group of people voted for someone else. In effect, they either don’t trust them, dislike their leadership, disagree with their perspective, or don't like their agenda.

When you are attacked verbally in an email, at work, or online remember that if 50% of the people like you and what you are doing you are doing well. By knowing and understanding that you will have enemies will help you brush off vituperative comments.

If you don't have enemies, you don't have character. - Paul Newman

Paul Newman said it well. I would change the thought slightly by saying that if you don’t have some people against you, you must not be leading and making a difference.

Make the hard decisions at work. Do what you as a leader know needs to be done. Tennis star Boris Becker said:

I don't really care what the man on the street thinks. I never did anything to please him in the first place, and I'm not going to start now. - Boris Becker

Ways to survive:

- Get a backbone and come to grips with reality. You can’t please everyone and you certainly can’t lead expecting everyone to love you.   There are people out in the world where you will be leading that don’t like anything and find comfort in putting others down.

- Keep your eye on your enemies and those trying to bring you down. Only you can be true to yourself and protect yourself from those that you don’t get along with at work.

Now you know that you are going to have to deal with rejection, frustration, and people who simply don’t like you. How do you deal with people who hate? Enimem has a good philosophy of protecting your back.

Dealing with backstabbers, there was one thing I learned. They're only powerful when you got your back turned. - Eminem

 

- Laugh at the mean comments and find humor when possible. You may not be able to do this right away, however, there is usually a piece of humor in most insults. If you can't find the humor laugh at something else and move on with your life.

Casey Stengel made me laugh with this comment:

The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided. - Casey Stengel

My father-in-law loved humor and would always say with a laugh:

Don’t let the bastards get you down - Louis Staak

 and

It’s hard to set the world on fire when someone keeps peeing on your match. - Louis Staak

Go out, get a torch and hold it high. The higher you hold your torch the harder it is for your distracters to put out the flame.

- Focus your energy in a positive direction and ignore those that are trying to infiltrate your mind. When you worry about what others say you are letting them win.

A day of worry is more exhausting than a week of work. - John Lubbock

- Forgive and forget will get you further than dwelling on the words of evil. 

Forgive your enemies because they are either insecure, giving in to societal pressures or going through something that makes them feel good about making you feel bad. - Sheena Sharma in Wellness

- Do something you love as it will distract you from the situation and you will find your inner peace.  I picked the photo of a surfer on the North Shore of Oahu as surfers, like many athletes, have a passion for their sport.  What I have learned about surfers is that when ridding a wave nothing else matters. Find your passion outside of business and do it.

Don’t push yourself uphill filled with negative thought and worry. Instead, load yourself up with positive thought and actions and take a joyful journey along the path of WOW leadership. 

Take Action Starting Today:

• When your mind starts to think of those that dislike you refocus on something more positive.
• Reach out to your distractors and try to work out a common ground. If you can't mitigate the situation at least you can feel good about yourself for being the bigger person.
• Write down a list of your positive skills and traits. Keep your list so you can look at your positives when negativity comments start to bother you.  

~~~

About Sheri Staak

More on Sheri Staak here at LinkedIn

While Sheri Staak is best known for leading, motivating, and directing large pharmaceutical sales teams, her passion is to help and mentor those on her team and in the world become WOW Leaders and WOW Individuals.

Her desire is to help both the established leader and the neophyte leader develop WOW Leadership skills.

___

"My goal is to help you achieve your leadership goals quicker and better than on your own."

~~~

The Book on WOW Leadership

Tune In to WOW Leadership is NOW AVAILABLE at Barnes & Noble, online at Amazon.com, and at more than 100 airport locations.

Tune In to WOW Leadership will help you become a WOW leader while improving your career goals and productivity.

5 @ 5 is a celebration of my reaching 5,000 followers here on LinkedIn.  Register to win one of 5 hardcover books I'm giving away as the 5,000 bar is passed.  Free Book Contest register now. 

FREE video leadership lessons available at: http://www.sheristaak.com/leadership-lessons/

~~~

The STAAK Report Blog

You can read more on WOW Leadership on the  The Staak Report blog.

 

Thank you very much for taking time to read my post here on LinkedIn Pulse.  I want to help you become a WOW leader and make a positive impact on the world.  If I can help one person become a better leader then I have achieved my goal.

Please share your comments as I enjoy reading them and hearing what you think.