The Secret Signals Your Body Language Sends to Men

November 15, 2009

You may not even realize all the messages your body language sends to a guy—before you even speak to him. Read on, and next time you spot a cute guy, you'll know exactly how to say, "Hello, there" without uttering a single word.

1/10

What fixing your hair or your outfit says to him

We do this when we're aware that we're being watched and we want to make sure we look our best, James says. Grooming gestures like these let him know that you've noticed he has checked you out.
2/10

What catching his eye—and holding it for a couple of seconds—says to him

This is the most powerful weapon in your body-language-flirting arsenal, says Judi James, author of The Body Language Rules: A Savvy Guide to Understanding Who's Flirting, Who's Faking, and Who's Really Interested."If you hold his gaze for just a half second longer than the usual split-second gaze, and then you look down and back at him, it tells the guy that you've considered him and you like what you see," James says. Try this move in a crowded bar or at a party.

3/10

What brushing his arm says to him

This is a boundary-testing touch. "Men see this as the first gesture to sex," James says. "You are inviting him to reciprocate and touch you in a similar way."
4/10

What your flushed cheeks say to him

Do you ever feel your cheeks heating up when you're talking to a particularly hot guy? "Sexual attraction will often lead to blushing," says James. Although you might feel a little embarrassed by the pink hue, it's a turn-on for guys. "Flushed cheeks can make you appear more attractive to men," she says. "It mimics the way you look when you're reaching orgasm."

5/10

What the way you interact with other people says to him

Playing with a friend's hair or touching a friend's arm while you talk to him or her acts as a representation of how you touch. "These quasisexual gestures tell a man that either he can be the recipient of your touching or he could be the one touching you in that way," James says.
6/10

What looking away as you kiss, hug or greet says to him

If you look around the room, at the door or even at another guy when you say hello to a man, it tells him that you're not that into him, says James. "You may even be on the lookout for someone else," she adds.

7/10

What your coy smile says to him

"If you smile subtly—without showing your teeth—while your eyes are slightly narrowed, you're telling a guy that you want to get to know him better," James says. This signal is best used when you first meet someone.
8/10

What mimicking his movements says to him

"Making subtle tweaks to mirror his movements shows him that you two are on the same page," says James. Mirroring his movements may sound awkward or too obvious, but something as subtle as holding your drink at the same height as his is all it takes.

9/10

What folding your arms says to him

"Classically, people see this is a barrier gesture that repels people," James says. There are two different versions, each with its own meaning. "If your arms are folded in a self-hug, so that your hands touch your rib cage, it can imply that you're feeling insecure or bored," she says. "If your arms are folded, so that your hands are on your biceps, you're telling him that you're not interested in talking."
10/10

What steady eye contact when he's talking says to him

"Giving him 100-percent eye contact when he's talking, while also nodding to show that you're listening, tells him that you value what he has to say," James says. But you should look away briefly when you're talking. "Too much prolonged eye contact when you speak can look intimidating or even dishonest."