When I got pregnant, my husband and I weren’t worried about the effects on our social life, sex life, or sleep schedules (perhaps a little on the last front). Our main concern was how having a baby would affect our travels. Most frequent jet-setters have heard similar refrains while pregnant: “Get your travel done now, because one that baby comes . . .” bleary-eyed parents say ominously.
Ignore the naysayers—it is possible to enjoy a robust traveling life after having children. While, yes, it requires enough planning and recon to put a CIA operative to shame, so do basically all aspects of life post-baby. We threw ourselves into the deep end early and often, and now that our daughter is almost 2, she’s been on more than 20 flights to five countries, with trips to spots both exceedingly child-friendly (shout-out to the kids’ club at Round Hill in Jamaica) and . . . well . . . not. (You can take a baby wine tasting in Bordeaux, right?)
Half the stress of traveling with children is simply getting there. Once you’re at your final destination, it all seems to fall into place. (At least, until you have to do it all over again on the return flight.) Here are but a few hard-won pieces of advice about how to travel with a baby while keeping your sanity intact.
Prepare, Prepare, Prepare A simple outing to the park with your baby requires 15 minutes of packing and planning, so a lengthy trip—especially to a foreign country—demands serious preparation. Make a list, check it twice—and then rip it to shreds, because parenting-on-the-go is all about flexibility.
Don’t Over Pack The understandable temptation will be to bring everything and the kitchen sink. Don’t. Figure out what baby gear you can temporarily do without, and have the rest shipped to you using a service such as Baby’s Away. Everything from high chairs to pack-and-plays to toys and beach tents can be waiting for you at your final destination, making the journey itself less stressful. “It makes packing a million times easier and ensures you’ll have everything you need,” says Rebecca Mall, head of industry, media, and entertainment at Google and mother of 19-month-old twins. “And your kids are excited to play with all the new toys, too. Best find ever.”
Schedule Flights During Nap Time Whether your flight is a long haul or a quick jaunt, schedule it during your child’s nap time. If you’re taking a red-eye, pick a departure time that coincides with bedtime. When your baby’s sleep schedule isn’t disrupted, it’ll be a more pleasant experience for everybody.
Ship Ahead If you’ll be gone longer than a few days, ship ahead items like diapers, wipes, and formula with Amazon or Diapers.com, and luggage with a shipment site specializing in travel, like Luggage Free. “You don't want to be in a strange place with weird diapers or not have access to the food your baby loves, but you don’t want to take up precious luggage space with that stuff, either,” says Kim-Marie Evans, mother of four and founder of the site Luxury Travel Mom.
Be Your Own Pharmacy Whatever might go wrong often will when traveling with kids. Whether it’s a cold, fever, stomach bug, or just a garden-variety headache, it helps to have your own medicine, prescriptions, and supplies at the ready. Otherwise, you might spend 20 minutes wandering the streets of Copenhagen looking for a pharmacy, only to discover that Aleve requires a prescription. (True story.) Do yourself a favor and bring, at minimum, baby Benadryl, baby Tylenol, a baby thermometer, and adult ibuprofen. Extra points for Xanax and Ambien for mom and dad.
Arrive Early—But Not Too Early Getting to the airport early both minimizes stress and allows your little ones time to run around beforehand and tire themselves out, if they’re already walking. However, excess airport time leads to bored children, which can lead to tears and tantrums. Half an hour earlier than you’d arrive if traveling child-free is usually the sweet spot.
Consider Your Final Destination If you’ll be hiking in New Zealand or strolling over miles of European cobblestones, forgo the convenience of a lightweight umbrella stroller for the mobility of your regular stroller. Keep in mind that standard baggage allowances make exceptions for baby gear: Most airlines will allow you to check a stroller and car seat for free.
But Gate Check the Stroller If You Can If you don’t need to bring your behemoth day-to-day stroller because of terrain, don’t—instead, gate-check a lightweight umbrella stroller. Some swear by the Babyzen Yoyo (which folds easily and can be stored in the overhead bin), others by the über-light UPPABaby G-Lite; my umbrella-of-choice is the Summer Infant 3D Lite, which reclines for naps-on-the-go—a critical feature.
Buy a Seat for Your Baby For a long-haul flight, having an extra seat for your child—even if they’re under 2, when they can ride in your lap for free—is a must. Flights are always smoother when your child has their own space, and even the crankiest child is more likely to fall asleep in his car seat. (And if you’re flying first or business class—yes, children are allowed, despite what the evil glares from cabinmates might have you think.)
Even If You’re Shipping Everything Else Ahead, Always Bring a Car Seat Domestic airlines allow you to bring a car seat on board if there’s an open space, meaning you might luck into a seat for your under-two’s even if you haven’t purchased one. (We’ve gotten lucky on international flights, too, although it’s rarer.) When you check-in, ask if the flight is full: if it’s not, bring the car seat through security to the gate. If the flight suddenly becomes full, you can gate-check it using a protective car seat bag like the JL Childress. It’s also worth investing in a lightweight and compact convertible car seat solely for your travels—two favorites are the Cosco Scenera Next, which weighs just 10 pounds, or the Graco ComfortSport, which weighs 12 pounds.
Be Seat Savvy If your baby is fewer than 20 pounds, reserve a bulkhead seat to take advantage of the bassinet, which can attach to the wall—plus, obviously, to enjoy extra legroom. If the bulkhead isn’t an option, try reserving an aisle and window seat in the back of the plane. It’s often the last row to get filled, and if you happen to have a stranger in between you and your partner, they’ll frequently swap. Many airlines are now reserving the last two rows for families, so that’s another reason to get to the airport early and claim those seats at the gate, especially if you have multiple kids.
Baby Wear Baby carriers can be lifesavers when traveling. Not only can you wear children through security—leaving you with two free hands for strollers, carry-ons, or boarding passes—but they’ll also come in handy when visiting museums, beaches, or other places where strollers either aren’t practical or aren’t permitted. They also allow for discreet breastfeeding, especially helpful during takeoff and landing.
Bonus: A baby strapped to your chest is a baby not crawling around, running down the aisles, or banging on the seat in front of you.
Prepare for the Worst on the Plane Think of the worst flight you ever took: the one where your flight was delayed, and you spent several hungry, cranky, miserable hours in the terminal or on the tarmac. Now imagine that with a baby. Even if you’re only flying a short distance, be prepared for the worst-case scenario, which means an iPad pre-loaded with kid-friendly content, a change of clothes for you and the baby, and enough diapers, formula, and snacks (if you’re not breastfeeding or your child is older) to last for up to 24 hours. Mother-of-three Stacey Bendet, CEO and Creative Director of Alice and Olivia, says, “iPads are an airplane mom’s best friend, I’m not opposed to travel bribes and keep an emergency Starburst stash, and I always have at least two outfit changes for everyone in case of spills and ills.”
Spring for VIP Services Whether it’s curbside check-in, expedited lines, or pre-boarding, VIP services at the airport will make the entire experience that much more enjoyable for you. Philanthropist Allison Weiss Brady, mother of two, swears by American Airlines Five Star Service, which starts at $250 per adult. “A representative from the airline greets you curbside, gets you right to the front of security, and then you have a mini-adventure on their golf cart en route to your gate, where they walk you right onto the plane,” she says. Delta and United offer VIP programs, too.
Get TSA PreCheck and Global Entry TSA understaffing means that airport security lines are expected to be especially long this summer, with travelers advised to get to the airport a mind-numbing three hours early. Skip the queue with TSA PreCheck. For only $85, TSA PreCheck provides you with five years of shorter lines, expedited screening, and the ability to leave your shoes on while going through security. If you travel internationally, Global Entry costs $100 and allows you to zip through customs when returning to the US, plus enrolls you in TSA PreCheck automatically.
Rent an Apartment House or apartment rental sites like VRBO, Airbnb, or Home Away help mimic a home environment, which can be especially helpful when traveling with babies and needing to frequently clean bottles, stock milk, or make special meals. Some cities have their own luxury rental sites, like Paris Perfect in the City of Lights, or One Fine Stay in London.
Family-Friendly Can Still Be Luxurious Sure, you could forgo the Four Seasons for the Hampton Inn—but why? “We've just done our most luxurious travel ever this year with our 13-month-old son, Henrik,” says Kathleen Porter Kristiansen, founder of the site Triple Passport. “Luxury travel is absolutely possible with kids—he’s been on 19 flights to eight countries.” Many five-star hotel chains have their own programs for the littles—Ritz-Carlton, Four Seasons, Grand Hyatt, Rosewood Collection, and St. Regis all offer kids programs with varying levels of activities, play structures, and even babysitting.
Request a Crib Ahead of Time Call the hotel in advance to request a pack-and-play, if you haven’t shipped one ahead, but remember to bring your child’s own sheets and loveys. The familiar scents of home will help them sleep better in a foreign environment. Telling a hotel you’re traveling with children also ensures a quieter room away from the elevators and with a tub.
Book An Extra Night Hotels often won’t let you check in until the afternoon, which can be problematic if you’re taking a red-eye and due to land at your final destination early in the morning. Brady recommends booking your hotel room from the night before. “That way, you can get into your room as soon as you arrive in the morning, have a good nap with the kids, and be fresh for an afternoon of sightseeing,” she says.
Out of Sight Whenever possible, book a suite or a room with a living room or two adjoining rooms so that your baby can sleep in the other room without seeing you. If a suite isn’t an option, get creative: The hallway or even bathroom can be excellent places to put the crib so you’re not in your baby’s line of sight at 6:00 a.m.
Stay On Your Own Time Zone The clock says 8:00 p.m. in your new destination, but to your child, it’s only 3:00 p.m. What to do? Consider keeping them on a schedule that’s as close to your original time zone as possible. If you’re traveling to Europe, this could mean wake-ups at noon and bedtime at midnight—confusing for nosy passers-by who see you out with your children at 9:30 p.m., but potentially easier for both you and the kids.
But Give it Three Days If You Can’t However, if staying on your own time zone isn’t practical—especially for trips longer than a week—babies are surprisingly flexible. (No, really.) After three days of crankiness and middle-of-the-night wake-ups, your little one will adjust to the new schedule.
Nap on the Go As schedule enthusiasts, my husband and I were terrified the first time our baby had to nap on the go. Turns out, kids are surprisingly malleable (when they’re young, at least). A little white noise on the iPhone, a swaddle or blanket over the stroller to block out light, and a long walk around town ensures museums or lunch for you while they’re zonked.
Babysitters are Your Friends If you feel comfortable leaving your children with a sitter, most five-star hotels have relationships with local babysitting agencies and can arrange a background-checked sitter for you. As weird as it might sound having a stranger in your hotel room, it’s a common request—although be forewarned that some agencies won’t allow hotel sitters to bathe children or perform certain duties. For children going through separation or stranger anxiety, book a late dinner and arrange for the sitter to come after they’re asleep.
Eat Early Just because you’re traveling with children doesn’t mean you’re condemned to a vacation involving kid’s menus and paper tablecloths. For nights when you don’t have a babysitter, figure out which restaurants you’re dying to try—and then book in for right when they open. Yes, this will occasionally mean 5:00 p.m. dinners, but you won’t have to endure nasty looks or rush out if the kids start acting up, and you’ll still be able to enjoy that hot new restaurant—no babysitter required.
Shiny and New While an iPad is a godsend for children as young as one year, they’re all but useless for infants—though great for you when your baby inevitably falls asleep in a weird position that means absolutely . . . no . . . moving. Babies can be distracted by shockingly pedestrian items: keys, tissues, even tape. “For on the plane activities, I usually bring a few small zippered bags filled with little toys to unwrap and play with,” says Marissa Hermer, restaurateur and mother of three. “Anything new, fun, and small makes the journey fly by.”