For years I threw parties on Saturday, dinner-party night across America. This was a huge mistake.
Saturdays invite ambitious cooking and, with it, stress. These parties had me running all day Saturday and beat on Sunday, because I’d spent half the weekend shopping, prepping, and cooking.
About a year ago, my husband, Tad, and I made a radical move: We started hosting on Friday. I know, I know—it sounds insane. But there’s been nothing but upside. The Friday-night party forces you to strategize your menu and be hyper-organized—instead of doing it all in one day, you spread out the work over the week, making game-day execution a breeze. Guests arrive excited for the weekend, ready to let loose and stay late. Sure, you can apply the same thinking to a Saturday party, but wouldn’t you rather free up the weekend? Come join me on my Friday-night dinner-party campaign.
1. START SIMPLE: Either make the hors d’oeuvres or make cocktails. Do both, and the party gods will be angry. I like to buy the appetizers (see below) and offer simple drinks. For this ginger-spiked Prosecco number, you can make the ginger syrup a week ahead; then all you have to do is add the bubbly.
2. SHOP WELL, AND THE NIBBLES WILL COME TOGETHER ON THEIR OWN: That said, steer clear of cheese—hors d’oeuvres are meant to tease, not tire. Here are a few easy ideas: Dust Marcona almonds with smoked paprika; shower cooked shrimp with fresh lemon juice, olive oil, and celery salt; set out an array of good, non-cucumber pickles (there are lots to choose from); buy pâté or cured meats and serve with crusty bread.
3. GREAT GUESTS MAKE GREAT PARTIES: Eight people is the magic number, and we send out invites with a three-week lead time (any longer, and people forget). It’s okay to introduce a few people to each other—we love that—but if they're all strangers, you’ll have some heavy lifting to do. Pick an “anchor guest,” then build the rest of the list around him/her. You need someone who’s provocative and lively or someone who’s funny. If you can get both, your evening will be a breeze.
4. DO (ONLY) ONE THING IN THE MOMENT: Limit yourself to a single dish that requires last-minute action. You can get the components for this salad ready on Thursday, then nonchalantly throw it together at the end of cocktail hour. If the timing isn't perfect, no worries. Sturdy escarole can sit for a few minutes, even when tossed with a warm vinaigrette.
5. FOR ADULTS ONLY: If your kids are little, or if they’re rascals, book a sitter. If they’re well-behaved (and a bit older), then include them in the hosting. Our 6-year-old twins answer the door and offer hors d’oeuvres. But when cocktail hour is over—off to bed.
6. DELEGATE WISELY: Don’t be a martyr: Divvy up the work! I’m the primary cook in my house, but I realized that having even one dish taken off of my list makes hosting so much more doable. Tad makes excellent roasted potatoes, so they’re often on the menu. He also heroically handles music, flowers, the dishwasher, and garbage, and lets me have any panic attacks in private.
7. AN ASSIGNED SEAT IS A GOOD THING: But don't use place cards, which will remind people of weddings or their stuffy aunt. Tad plans the seating and makes sure no one goes rogue. Direct the funny person to the middle and put the shy ones near the hosts. Couples should not sit near each other. Sometimes, Tad and I will switch seats for dessert so we can mix up the dynamic.
8. BANK THE ENTRÉE: Choose a main course that tastes even better if it sits overnight, like a braise or stew. You’ll love knowing it’s done long before guests arrive (and that it’s even more delicious that way—win-win!). During cocktails, reheat these ribs: 200° for 30 minutes takes care of that.
9. DON'T KNOW WINE? OUTSOURCE IT: I share our menu and budget with a wine shop that I trust and let them choose what we’ll drink. Oh—they deliver it, too!
10. GO FISH, BUT GO SLOW: If you want to serve seafood, find a recipe that doesn’t chain you to the stove. One of my party tricks is slow-roasted fish, which involves a low oven and a shallow olive-oil bath. Most 1"-thick pieces of fish will cook in 30 minutes. If the fish is done before you’re ready to sit down, simply turn off the oven—it will hold. If it isn’t quite ready when you are, crank up the heat to 350° and it’ll finish quickly.
11. WHEN IT COMES TO MUSIC, SET IT AND FORGET IT: Figure out who the music person is in your family and have him or her set up a playlist. Turn it on, and don’t think about it again (make sure it’s long enough to not repeat songs). Tad has even created a cleaning-up playlist for after everyone leaves.
12. MISTAKES SHOULD BE DOWNPLAYED: In the spirit of Benjamin Disraeli, who remarked, “Never complain, never explain,” never apologize. If a dish falls short or the wine is corked, make light of it and move on.
13. LIGHTING MATTERS: Make your friends look good: Give them the dinner-party version of airbrushing. Dim the ceiling bulbs and break out your (unscented) candles. Votives are best because they don’t interrupt anyone’s sight line.
14. MAKE THE LAST COURSE FIRST: Most desserts can be made ahead; use this to your advantage. If I’m baking a tart, I’ll prep the dough on Tuesday. Or I’ll plan a cake or pudding that can be fully prepared the day before. This is key, because by the time the dessert course rolls around, the last thing you want is more fussing in the kitchen.