9 Ways Texting Can Majorly Mess With Your Dating Life

1. You rely on texting for crucial conversations. 

Even though it can be awkward and you might be super nervous, certain topics should be discussed face-to-face, like deciding whether or not to be exclusive, saying "I love you" for the first time, and breaking up. It's tempting to side-step a nerve-wracking convo with a text, but texts can be hard to interpret and can easily lead to miscommunication. Bringing these topics up are hard enough, you don't want to then be unsure what the outcome was or how your S.O. feels. That DTR convo can easily blow up in your face if your text is taken the wrong way. And as uncomfy as it might be, you'll feel a lot better if you're 100 percent clear on where you stand. 

2. You base the quality of your relationship on the strength of your texting game.

When you're waiting hours for your crush to text you back, you might assume that the relationship isn't going to take off. It can be hard not to take it personally or read into everything your crush is or isn't texting,  but try not to leap to conclusions or get upset. First, stop to consider why they're not answering. It's completely likely that they're busy doing homework, hanging out with their crew, still at basketball practice, or didn't hear their phone go off. 

Likewise, try not to read too much into what their texts say. Using a thumbs up instead of a smiley face emoji doesn't necessarily mean you're being friend-zoned. Texts are notoriously easy to misinterpret, so wasting your time freaking out over one or two words, isn't worth it, and some people just aren't big on texting. How do they act around you when you hang out in-person? If they're always flirting with you and finding reasons to talk to you or touch you, don't stress too much about their texts. On the other hand, if they rarely ever respond to your texts and they never go out of the way to talk to you when you see them in the hallway, they might not be feeling it, in which case, it's their loss and you can move on. 

3. You're constantly texting with other people when you two hang out. 

It sucks to make plans to hang out or chat someone up at a party, only to find that the person you're with is more invested in their phone than they are in you. You might be trying to play it cool, but it sends the message that you're not into them and would rather be somewhere else. Plus, it prevents you from bonding. Ditch your phone in your school bag and enjoy your bae's company! 

4. They're constantly texting with other people when you two hang out.

Put the situation into perspective: Do they interrupt a story you're telling to text back their mom, or do they frequently invite you to hang out, then spend half the time glued to their phone talking to someone else? The first sitch is a minor annoyance, but doesn't mean they're not into you. The second, however, is a legit reason to be upset. Try talking to them about it — we're all so addicted to our phones, they may not even realize they're doing it.Just try saying something like, "Hey, would you mind putting your phone away? Mine's away too and I was hoping we could talk."  

5. You stress way too much over crafting the perfect response. 

It's one thing to ask your best friend to read over a flirty text before you press "send." It's another to run every single text by a committee of your best friends, your sister, your close guy friend, and your brother and then your bff again.   That's enough to drive any girl crazy, not to mention, when you stress that much about every text you send, it will make it a lot harder to have a casual convo in person.

One way to keep it in perspective is to think about what the recipient of your texts is doing. Is he or she likely to stress out over sending the funniest text ever, or are they more of the "Hey how was your weekend haha mine was good" type? There's no reason to get nervous about crafting the wittiest text ever if you're communicating with someone who doesn't put in the same level of effort. But if you are talking to a Certified Texting Genius, relax: They're texting you because they like you. There's no need to worry about impressing them — you already have! 

6. You can't stop fixating on every text they send.

Reading and re-reading a particularly cute text is part of the fun of having a crush. And really, who hasn't done that? Again there's a spectrum. Do you occasionally scroll all the way back to December to reread that one cute text that made you smile? Or do you fall asleep every night reading through arguments you had months ago, or analyzing every text you sent each other that week? If you fall into the latter category, consider deleting certain texts or conversations in order to rid yourself of the temptation. 

If you're fixating on any aspect of your relationship — texts included — it's worth considering why. Are you insecure about your relationship status? Are you fighting a lot and maybe something's not right? Is your relationship the biggest part of your life right now?Relationships should be added extras but they shouldn't take over your life. If yours is making you feel insecure, it might be time to talk and figure out where you stand or move on.  It could be that you're making your relationship the main event in your life right now, which is easy to do when you're really into someone, but can put too much pressure on your relationship and drive you both cray. If you throw yourself into something you're really passionate about, like auditioning for the school musical or challenging yourself to run a 5K, you'll be so busy and excited about your new project that you might obsess less about your relationship. 

7. You accidentally texted something embarrassing about your crush directly to them.

Between the humiliation, shock, and guilt, you might feel like being swallowed in a slimy sinkhole, but you're actually going to live. Promise. 

Spring into damage control mode. If the text is ambiguous enough (not something like "I saw Josh today. He looks SO HOT!"), you can try to play it off as a joke... but there's a pretty good chance they'll see through your cover-up. If you said something hurtful, it's time to own up and sincerely apologize. 

If you accidentally let it slip that you think they're the best person on the planet and kind of maybe sort of want to take your relationship to the next level, that cat is out of the bag. Maybe they feel the same way! Your texting mishap could end up working in your favor. And if not, isn't that ultimately good information to know before you get any more invested?

8. You send sexy pics you wouldn't want anyone else to see. 

First, know that if you're under 18 and/or the recipient is, taking and sending nude photos (even of yourself) is a serious crime. And secondly, consider what would happen if the photos fell into the wrong hands. It would be a nightmare, right? If your boyfriend or girlfriend truly cares about your wellbeing, they shouldn't ask you to do anything you're not comfortable with, especially if it's illegal. If they can't respect that, it's time to consider ending the relationship. 

Even if you just want to be flirty by surprising your boo with a sexy pic, think twice before you press send. What if their friends or parents accidentally pick up their phone and see it? Or you break up one day and it's still on their phone?  Even if you totally trust your S.O., if their phone gets into the wrong hands or they accidentally send or post it, your private pic could end up going around the interweb. So make sure that's a risk you're willing to take. 

9. You read their texts without them knowing.

The temptation can be real, but just don't do it. Whether you're looking for answers about your relationship status, feeling jealous of other girls who text him, or just hoping to learn more about your crush, reading their texts without their permission is a serious invasion of privacy. Think about how you would feel if they did the same to you, or if they caught you snooping through their phone.  You've seen it on TV enough times by now to know how easy it is to misinterpret a totally innocent text and then ruin a perfectly good relationship over nothing.Reading their texts probably won't give you the answers you need, and think about what you'd do if you did find something sketchy— it's not exactly like you could bring it up without also admitting you had totally invaded their privacy.