What is meant by a "good" kisser? A good kisser is a person who kisses exactly like you do. So everyone can be a good kisser to someone. However, if you do crazy things, there won't be a lot of someones that think you're good. I find that most people aren't too bad at kissing. A surprising number are quite good. Sometimes you meet a 37-year-old who is horrible and you think, How have you gotten to this age, still slobbering? I've had a few aggressive Italians stick their tongue down my esophagus and behind my upper lip and then all over my chin. And I've thought, On what woman does this work? Nevertheless, they're still kissing like that.
Anyway, here are 7 signs you're a "good" kisser to the general population.
1. You're in sync with him (or her).
I don't know if it's chemistry or instinct or what, but somehow two people often know what to do—that is, one person's lips always matches the other's. Maybe one person is technically following the other person with their lips, but it doesn't feel like that. You both just open your mouths together at the same speed and to the same circumference. You're kissing the same.
2. You don't kiss everyone the same.
If you're in sync with one guy, you can't kiss the same exact way and be in sync with another. There are slightly altered styles, but with chemistry—or whatever it is—you adapt right away.
3. You don't bite or suck on the upper or lower lip.
I think people try to get fancy, but it's not impressive. If a guy goes off course, it makes you pause and think, and you don't really want to be pausing or thinking. You wait to see what he's doing, or wait until it's over. And that's like a choreographer changing the dance. You have to stop and watch. And then you're not in sync anymore. Someone's doing a solo act.
4. You keep your tongue to yourself after age 25.
I remember in college there was a lot more tongue involved. Nowadays, it's mostly the chewing motion with no tongue. Maybe a little tongue, but it doesn't really leave your own mouth; it just kinda greets at the door. The tongue does a lot of work in its college phase. It does the circle thing, which is fine but ultimately a solo act (see above), unless you both take turns, which is fine too, but unnecessary, and can be gross with a guy you're lukewarm about.
5. You use lip balm!
It's distracting when someone licks his lips right before he kisses you. Just use Chapstick, people. Licking your lips dries you out even more. (Click on the following links for the 7 best lip balms, a list of your favorite smoochable lip balms, how to cure chapped lips (for real), and bacon-flavored lip balm!)
6. You know how to relax.
Relax your lips; don't be tense. The pressure should be similar to that of applying the aforementioned lip balm. Not too hard or too soft. If a guy's too soft and light, like I could be kissing a feather that's about to float away, I always think he's not that into it.
7. Remember that it doesn't matter if you have thin lips and he has full lips, or vice versa.
So stay confident and do your thing. And when I say "your," I mean it in the plural. Both of you: do your thing together and in sync!
What's the worst kiss you've ever experienced? Who was your best?
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