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Guys who watch camgirls, what is the point?

(self.AskMen)

submitted by EnderWiggin69

I never watched a cam girl before but today I was bored, so I logged onto chaturbate. Between the bored sounding chicks begging for tips to apparently start a vibrator for 3 seconds, to the music in the background being played through a potato, to the weird comment dudes in the chat and the chick constantly reaching over to peck out shit on a keyboard while the guy struggles to keep his dick hard, I totally don't get it. Wouldn't it be more fun to blow a load to a good porn vid instead.

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[–][deleted] 1261 points1262 points  (119 children)

I have a close friend who gets paid to do cam shows.

From what I've seen, about everyone who has offered to pay for a show is someone that's obviously too shy or awkward irl to get any female interaction. It seems like they fill that void by paying a chick online to treat them nicely and be attracted to them. One of the viewers even started calling the shows "dates", so you can imagine the much bigger problems these dudes have.

[–][deleted]  (93 children)

[deleted]

    [–]J__Man 186 points187 points  (58 children)

    Better to just pay an escort

    [–][deleted]  (56 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]EnderWiggin69[S] 58 points59 points  (0 children)

      It would really do you a lot of good to get out of your own head. Just take the plunge and do something instead of talking yourself out of everything.

      [–][deleted] 71 points72 points  (18 children)

      But, no matter what, the interaction still helps build confidence and that is ultimately what woman want in their man. Once you get all the weirdness of interacting with woman out of your system, you can move on to the real thing. It’s like doing a bunch of job interviews, sure the first one is rough, shit the 2nd and third are ok, but like the 4th you damn near walk in grabbing your junk ready to drop the mother fucking microphone. You just need to get yourself out there.

      [–]Saubande 62 points63 points  (11 children)

      One could argue that building confidence this way might lead to wrong assumptions afterwards, and influence the behavior to the negative. It's an artificial situation.

      [–]embracing_insanity 34 points35 points  (8 children)

      Maybe instead of the typical escort, women should offer 'coaching' sessions. Where they can provide honest coaching and feedback to inexperienced and/or shy guys and allow them to practice interactions that would help them out in the real world, with real people.

      Shoot, I could see this helping people in general who have social anxiety or just aren't that great or confident in social situations, regardless of gender.

      [–]throwaway246oh1 8 points9 points  (2 children)

      “women should offer” ...

      [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 7 points8 points  (1 child)

      Right? Creepy.

      [–]embracing_insanity 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Well, ha ha - didn't actually think of it like that. I'm a woman and was mostly following the 'escort' discussion taking place above and literally thought it might actually be a viable service to offer - just social interactions and not just for men by women for relationship reasons. Just interacting with people in general.

      But I can see how it can also come off as creepy sounding. Not my intention.

      edit: missing words

      [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 28 points29 points  (1 child)

      There are already people who do this. They're called sex therapists. I think it's a great idea but, like with everything else, guys who abuse it will ruin it.

      [–]mao_intheshower 11 points12 points  (0 children)

      How would you abuse it? You're paying for the advice, you either use it or ignore it.

      [–]justheretoBehappy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      That’s a fantastic idea!

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        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

        [removed]

          [–]kellykebabMale 13 points14 points  (0 children)

          You're not going to build transferable confidence to the real world by paying a shitty actress to pretend she doesn't hate you. Just start talking to normal people more often. Start with cashiers and waitresses and move on to acquaintances, friends of friends, coworkers, and strangers at the gym.

          Using prostitutes to "build confidence" will instill delusion that will be completely shattered by the real world. Totally counterproductive.

          [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 9 points10 points  (0 children)

          I don't think the experience is analogous because it's someone who won't say "no" unless I really do something awful. My biggest fear isn't outright rejection, though that's one of them. I'm most scared of someone thinking they like me until they get to know me. That's happened a lot to me and is more of a blow to your confidence than just a straight no.

          [–]ninja_byang 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          Can agree, I had a friend take to me a strip club to help me get over my anxiety of talking to women.

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            [–][deleted]  (18 children)

            [deleted]

              [–][deleted] 37 points38 points  (5 children)

              As someone who is into socially awkward guys

              So please put yourself out there

              I appreciate your situation, but you really need to recognize how at odds these two statements are. If these guys were able to "just put themselves out there," they wouldn't be socially awkward, and you wouldn't be attracted to them.

              And as a guy who is socially awkward and does try to put himself out there, it doesn't do me any good if the girls who are into my type don't step up and say something. I'm oblivious, somebody's gotta speak up.

              [–][deleted]  (4 children)

              [deleted]

                [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (3 children)

                I’m just saying don’t give up hope.

                At some point it's less "giving up hope" and more "being realistic." I'm 32 years old. Realistically speaking, my ratio of relationship-to-single life is so incredibly out of whack that I've never built the proper relationship experience to really be able to handle one. I'm not a catch, and any woman who thinks I am finds out pretty quickly that they were wrong. No number of "Up and at'em"s is going to change that, and frankly they get kind of annoying after a while.

                [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 7 points8 points  (1 child)

                I think there aren't enough women like you, and they don't live nearby.

                And I've been with women who say they like socially awkward guys. I don't think they realized just how awkward I am.

                [–]Mimicpants 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                I’m curious, what would draw you to a socially awkward person? In my experience social awkwardness often exhibits itself through inappropriateness in public or social situations, or other similar issues.

                [–]kellykebabMale 13 points14 points  (8 children)

                Beware of chicks like this. Inevitably, they are either into "awkward" dudes because they immaturely idealize male insecurity as "sweetness" and "emotional depth" or they just subconsciously want to control men. Sometimes it's both!

                All the awkward dudes I've met who actually have girlfriends just get pushed around by these chicks.

                [–]Garteshado 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                Cognitive bias. You think that nobody wants you. So your brain keeps making you think you're unwantable. It's a vicious circule. You need help to go through this.

                [–]SamuraiRafiki 4 points5 points  (3 children)

                The escort doesn't want anyone she's with, and you're probably not her most obnoxious or least desirable client. Same with the camgirl. If you've got the cash, it might not be a bad idea to interact with women in that kind of environment.

                [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 12 points13 points  (2 children)

                Except my problem is that I don't think women want me. Being around more women who don't want me doesn't seem like it's going to help.

                [–]SamuraiRafiki 8 points9 points  (0 children)

                I'm saying don't worry about if this particular woman wants you, use her as a training resource to make yourself more desirable to other women in an environment free from rejection.

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                    [–]the_ocalhoun♂ 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                    Or a stripper. Strippers are excellent in the 'paid to pretend I like you' game.

                    [–][deleted] 66 points67 points  (5 children)

                    Its a cycle, you feel bad about yourself, this pushes away girls, you feel worse about yourself and etc. To break the cycle, maybe make a conscious decision not to care about what women think for 6 months to a year. Make yourself the centre of your own attention for that time. Work on yourself, hit the gym, learn new things, read new books or read the classics etc. Eventually you'll find you are putting yourself first and arent pedestalising girls. You will also be pretty confident because of all the changes you've just gone through. Then after that year is up, start going out and start talking to girls. Its December so this could be an early new years resolution.

                    [–]sane-ish 23 points24 points  (1 child)

                    For sure. An important part of this, too, is allowing yourself to make mistakes when you do finally start going on dates. Dating is a skill that you have to learn. It initially feels unnatural.

                    [–]orntorias 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                    Wish I could up vote this more, seems like basic advice but I had a basic introduction to dating and in the beginning, most dudes have no idea how to talk to women, hell some of my friends still don't! But dating is a learning curve kinda program, It takes practise.

                    [–]PsychologistBrain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                    Listen to heaps of interesting podcasts. Those things are the bomb!

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                      [–]DrNapkin 6 points7 points  (1 child)

                      Why do you feel you can't interact with women?

                      [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                      Because the thought of it fills me with the same sort of terror as opening a door and finding a hungry bear on the other side.

                      [–]alfredo094Male 4 points5 points  (3 children)

                      I'm good with women (it would actually be more accurate to say I just have good social skills) but I'm terrible at sexual skills. I eventually just paid an escort to have sex with me and be done with my virginity.

                      I just don't understand traditional courting, if that makes any sense. I think we overcomplicate things... and that's fine, people have different values than mine, I'm just annoyed that I can't afford sex and I can't seem to get it through other ways (and yes I have tried dating apps).

                      The whole "I don't know how to interact with women" is like a bad meme to me though. I don't think that women are different enough to warrant a whole of other social skills in order to be with a woman. I think it's just people making self-fulfilling prophecies.

                      My experience might just be biased though. I study psychology so most of the people I hang out with are women.

                      [–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 4 points5 points  (2 children)

                      I worded that poorly. I'm able to interact with women platonicaly just fine. I was dancing with someone at my office Christmas party and I was only able to do it because I know she's not interested in me and is married and I'm not interested in being more than her friend.

                      But if it had been my office crush I would have spent the whole night avoiding her. Which I did.

                      [–]Beaner1xx7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                      Pop on Tinder or Bumble, my dude. Having been there, it's all about those first steps and learning from your mistakes. Hell, I didn't try and date till my later 20's because of that same anxiety, but you go through a few failed dates, figure out a good rhythm, and then you're coasting. You'll feel a lot better reminiscing over cringe worthy moments you had on shitty first dates and how you've grown since than remembering that time you paid for sexual gratification.

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                        [–][deleted]  (16 children)

                        [deleted]

                          [–]top_KeK_420Male 106 points107 points  (13 children)

                          Agree to disagree.

                          Thats just faking it, and both of them are lying to each other. Thats far from "better than nothing" to me.

                          [–]eazolan 33 points34 points  (12 children)

                          That's most jobs in a nutshell.

                          Unless you think your server at a Restaurant is actually happy to see you?

                          [–]J__Man 25 points26 points  (8 children)

                          I'm usually happy to see people

                          [–][deleted] 44 points45 points  (7 children)

                          Maybe try camming?

                          [–]J__Man 13 points14 points  (6 children)

                          I'm a man lol

                          [–]marshnellowFemale 49 points50 points  (1 child)

                          You’ve got the wrong attitude

                          [–]DemandsBattletoads 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                          Flair checks out.

                          [–]kobibeef 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                          A cam man

                          [–]kingeryckMale 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                          Dudes will pay you I bet

                          [–]eazolan 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                          DID YOU JUST ASSUME YOUR GENDER?!

                          [–]Airazz♂ 12 points13 points  (2 children)

                          You can become actual friends with bar and restaurant workers if you're nice and you go there regularly.

                          There was one awesome bartender in a bar near me, really nice guy, friend of everyone, he also organised events, small gigs for garage bands and all that, it was fun. After working there for a few years he decided that he wanted to start doing bigger gigs with better bands, so he went to work in another bar, on the other side of town. Lots of regulars followed him there, so did I because he was a genuinely awesome bartender.

                          He didn't even do it for tips, in fact he refused them, he even gave discounts to people he knew.

                          He's quit bartending altogether now, so I went back to that first bar and befriended the new bartender. Cool girl, really tough, likes and rewards people who are nice. I went there yesterday, the bar was supposed to close at 11 but we stayed until 3am, drinks on the bar.

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                            [–]Kahmael 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                            Ok, that makes a lot of sense. Those guys drive the porn industry.

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                              [–]kalashnikovkitty9420 361 points362 points  (13 children)

                              Some people on chaturbate are just there for fun. A lot of the couples fuck and just want you to watch. It’s a hit or miss. But some live feeds I’ve seen for free are amazing!

                              [–][deleted] 159 points160 points  (11 children)

                              They also make a ton of money. Women are more profitable than guys, and couples even more so still. Easy for a decent looking guy to pull in $100 in an hour or two doing the same thing he would be doing if nobody were watching.

                              [–][deleted] 48 points49 points  (7 children)

                              Yeah I know a girl who did cam shows and made a grand a week. Offered to let me in on it too but I didn't really wanna show my face on one of those things.

                              [–]EnderWiggin69[S] 55 points56 points  (6 children)

                              Should have worn a Guy Fawkes mask

                              [–][deleted] 42 points43 points  (2 children)

                              I considered covering my face but then I thought well shit I'm insecure about my body too, plus I'll get all nervous and won't be able to perform, and having sex while random guys comment on it in real time just... wouldn't be sexy. So for a lot of reasons I noped out.

                              [–]falcon4287Male 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                              I don't blame you. I probably would nope out as well.

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                                [–]MunkeeMann 8 points9 points  (1 child)

                                This guy Fawkes

                                [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                Buzzfeed unsolved?

                                [–]cool_meth_guy 7 points8 points  (1 child)

                                How would a decent looking male go about getting started?

                                [–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

                                Chaturbate is probably your best option. The vast majority of people watching you as a male will be gay men, so if you are comfortable fooling around or flirting with another dude, that will literally triple to quadruple your income. Just be kind, answer questions, and you should be good to go. Watch some of the other popular males for some ideas.

                                [–]Qieth♂ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                I wouldn't normally be doing that thing for two hours though..!

                                [–]Chickachic-aaaaahhh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                Yes yes they can be quite amazing.

                                [–]AnUnsungBard 395 points396 points  (3 children)

                                I guess it's the appeal of having the actions being preformed live.

                                [–]unsociablerandomer 186 points187 points  (0 children)

                                Search through, find someone doing what you want to see, mute, full screen, whack off and log off. Sorted.

                                [–]ShikiRyumahoMale 244 points245 points  (12 children)

                                Masturbating, I guess. Maybe I'm a freak though.

                                [–]friedrice6trash taste in waifu 230 points231 points  (4 children)

                                Yep. Only you. No one else does that nasty disgusting thing only you do.

                                [–]LiteralTP 9 points10 points  (0 children)

                                I hope you realise you’re performing the devils work

                                [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                                Degeneracy.

                                [–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (4 children)

                                But it’s pretty much porn that attempts to blue ball you for 3 hours to make you give them money.

                                [–]ShikiRyumahoMale 50 points51 points  (3 children)

                                I did not watch camgirls that blue balled me for 3 hours. That is on you.

                                [–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

                                there are climax points in the cam shows, like when they squirt or something. theres like a whole dopamine rush when she does squirt bc you cant really skip through a live video to see it, so you gotta wait.

                                [–]TooEdgy4U 54 points55 points  (2 children)

                                Its the only way I can talk to my daughter

                                [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                                Okay, this should be the most upvoted post here

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                                  [–]Secreet 137 points138 points  (8 children)

                                  I have a bit of voyeuristic tendency in me and sometimes watching camgirls taps into that. Usually it's just a low quality masturbation video though, as you said.

                                  My ideal session would go like this.

                                  Find a good looking girl still all dressed. Not lingerie. That's important. It has to be something you could see someone wear outside.

                                  Usually it ends up beeing in a less popular channel because the pros are already naked doing their shows. But it cant be too unpopulated because I have no interest in talking to them or them talking to me.

                                  Then just fantasize about seeing this person naked, just like I would do after seeing someone in real life that was extra intriguing. Only now, there's the extra thrill of that I might actually get to see everything. That's what I like, and if I'm lucky the person does a good job teasing the audience for some time. The climax would be the big reveal, the undressing or the flashing, which I would sometimes put in tips for to get. I only tip anonymously as I dont want to be part of it. I only want to spy on it.

                                  The reveal is comparable to the same excitement you have when you get to see your date undress for the first time. It can only happen once per person however, because then the fantasy is ruined and replaced with reality.

                                  So yeah, thanks for making put my voyeuristic side into words for the first time.

                                  [–]thefoodhatingfoodie 14 points15 points  (1 child)

                                  Have you watched the Netflix movie The Voyeur yet?

                                  [–]Secreet 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                                  Yes :)

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                                    [–]J4viatorFemale 26 points27 points  (0 children)

                                    I very briefly dabbled in camming on mfc during university, and know a couple of girls who've done it.

                                    The sense I always got was that 90% of the guys there were just visiting out of curiosity, or as a once in a while thing when they wanted to see a girl naked.

                                    The other 10% were the ones who registered and tipped, and I think they're the ones who craved the social interaction. Like I say, I was only on briefly, but the regulars I had were typically guys with busy careers that seemed to preclude relationships, or guys who were very shy around women. There were also a few who I think were, sadly, in loveless marriages, divorced or widowers.

                                    If anyone's curious, the relationship you develop with these guys is pretty genuine- we're social animals, so it's hard to spend hours chatting with someone several times a week and not form a bond. In fact getting attached to regulars was a big part of why I packed it in. I couldn't get used to asking people for money when they felt more like friends than customers.

                                    [–]dethb0y 75 points76 points  (4 children)

                                    What's the point of any entertainment? It's like asking why i pay 2$ to have a bottle of pabst at my local bar instead of just sitting at home and drinking.

                                    [–]Kwasizur 27 points28 points  (1 child)

                                    Yeah, better to drink at home.

                                    [–]yeeiserLevel 20 Paladin 12 points13 points  (1 child)

                                    Honestly I prefer drinking at home. Interacting with other humans is too much of a hassle for a drink

                                    [–]dethb0y 8 points9 points  (0 children)

                                    There's something to be said for both, i think. I like the bar for the atmosphere, my house for the lack of judgement and lower costs.

                                    [–]another30yovirgin 19 points20 points  (0 children)

                                    I have only watched archived videos, but honestly, I really don't need to watch sex to enjoy porn. I'd rather just see a girl doing naked stuff. Really, I don't care if she masturbates, as long as she's not wearing clothes. So I like watching camgirls, because they don't involve sex as much and I'm not having to skip over the 20 minute blowjob and the positions where I can't see her very well.

                                    [–]WangChi 198 points199 points  (7 children)

                                    We got a free trial of ten minutes, spent it trying to get someone to shit on a bowl. Great success.

                                    [–][deleted] 63 points64 points  (5 children)

                                    What the fuck LOL

                                    [–]WangChi 114 points115 points  (4 children)

                                    We weren't paying, and we figured, "why not?" There was like 5 of us watching, we asked a handful of women if they would do it before we connected. I'll never forget how she ran to get a bowl, then had performance anxiety. She shoved her finger in her ass and pulled it out covered in shit to show us she had tried. This was right as the video went back to the free group stream. Everyone saw her with a shitty finger.

                                    I'm a horrible person

                                    [–]Nergaal 6 points7 points  (1 child)

                                    You are a shitty person

                                    [–]WangChi 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                                    Actually, SHE was a shitty person. At least part of her was.

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                                      [–]TryAndDoxMe 9 points10 points  (0 children)

                                      Lmao this is great.

                                      [–]MeweldeMoore 60 points61 points  (4 children)

                                      I never have but I imagine the only reason I would would be to make the girl balance a keyboard on her head for tips. Or maybe dangle a spoon from her nose.

                                      [–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

                                      could use some help with my women's studies homework... $50 they'll do anything right ?

                                      [–]kingeryckMale 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                                      Put a shoe on your head.

                                      [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                      I used Chaturbate once a couple years ago and I just did random, dumb shit on webcam and it was so much fun. People would give me weird tasks like make my bed or do a plank. I remember for half of it I just brought my dog on webcam and showed everyone all of his tricks haha. Then whenever my dog wasn't present everyone just asked about him. He stole the show.

                                      [–]Yavin4RedditLate 30s Male On Nitro 37 points38 points  (2 children)

                                      Same appeal as Twitch streamers or Youtubers. Community and personality. The sex and nudity is just a bonus.

                                      [–][deleted] 40 points41 points  (1 child)

                                      Some of the twitch streamers seem to get the sites mixed up

                                      [–]yetanotheraccountolo 11 points12 points  (0 children)

                                      I don't watch camgirls, but I can imagine some people see it as a step more intimate than porn, because it's live and interactive.

                                      [–]HedgeRunnerThe Unconventional Contrarian 38 points39 points  (0 children)

                                      People are coming to conclusions that are just too stereotypical. "Oh the guy must be some extreme hermit living in a basement with 3 4k monitors and cannot find or talk to girls IRL" as if girls IRL are some rare species and these people are just so introverted that they can't even interact with 50% of the human race.

                                      If you are doing one vs. one videos, that's interaction right fucking there. You say something, she does something. She says something, you respond to it. Just the mere act of knowing you will NEED to interact in some way demonstrates that these guys may be shy but don't act like being hit by medusa's gaze when they see a chick naked.

                                      My theory is:

                                      • Guys who watch are just bored of regular porn. (cough* OP cough* :D)

                                      • Guys who pay are looking for efficient real female romance/sexual interaction. Are these people totally clueless to girls? Maybe, but they still can talk to them. However, I'd argue a huge portion of them just got fed-up spending hours on Tinder.

                                      [–]Catsarenotreptilians 9 points10 points  (0 children)

                                      I'm a guy who has no idea how to interact with women romantically or sexually, I tried using OKCupid today and it just seemed totally unorganic.

                                      I just want someone to show me attention, tell me they like me, I don't actually go on chaterbate, I go to pornhub and look for the best parts in their long live streams and jerk it to that.

                                      I am basically incapable of meeting women, and women in the real world ignore me/avoid me like I am a leper.

                                      [–]LordLysergic 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                                      I dated a modestly successful MyFreeCams cam girl for 5 years. She could be very fun and charming, and there was a lot of good conversation and joking around in her chat room. She would dance and obviously do sexual stuff. So I can understand why men (and some women) would watch her; she was entertaining and beautiful. And she would communicate back to the guys in her room.

                                      If you were a lonely, socially inept dude with money to spare, cam girls can be a fun hobby. I guess.

                                      [–]TattooHelpPlease2 28 points29 points  (5 children)

                                      My buddy admits to spending thousands on cam sites. He tries to tell me that they like him and think he's funny. I don't understand how he can be so jaded

                                      [–]therakel749 35 points36 points  (2 children)

                                      That’s the opposite of what jaded means.

                                      [–]TattooHelpPlease2 11 points12 points  (1 child)

                                      Oh gee, that word doesnt mean what I thought it meant. Thank you

                                      [–]throwaway246oh1 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                                      That’s the opposite of what gee means.

                                      [–]DevreckasMale 10 points11 points  (0 children)

                                      I think you’re looking for naive or gullible.

                                      [–]ThisWasYourNightmare 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                      Ignorance is bliss

                                      [–]perern 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                                      I found Scarletloveu yesterday, spent 30 minutes discussing dog training. Then watching her suck a dildo and cum with it using a magic wand, none of that fake shaking reaction to tips either

                                      [–]coatrack68 13 points14 points  (0 children)

                                      The neighbors get pissed if they see me watching them...

                                      [–]kellykebabMale 8 points9 points  (1 child)

                                      That shit is the complete bottom end of prostitution. Occasionally, I'll check out a free video from cams and it is the least sexy, most transparent sex-for-cash transaction imaginable. These chicks never bother to fabricate any kind of believable sexual scenario because they are too busy asking for tips every time they adjust one of their tits. Shit is like Sodom and Gommarah meets a flea market. Guys who pay for this are habituating themselves to the idea that every act of affection from a woman requires a man's immediate sacrifice. Not at all healthy.

                                      [–]trollly 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                      For some people, that is the point.

                                      [–]cat-of-disapproval 82 points83 points  (138 children)

                                      I basically watch camgirls instead of TV. I usually have a window open to one at night, while I'm playing a game or whatever I'm doing. (It helps that I don't have an actual TV.) There are a few I've come to really like, and I almost listen to them like a podcast. I do tip them too, but not very much. Basically, I tip camgirls like I tip bartenders. And since I'm not there for the big moaning sex show, I tend to tune out when they do them. (I watch actual porn to get off. Hard to go back from 60fps 1080p crystal clear professionally edited fapbait.)

                                      [–]BlazerFS23 58 points59 points  (2 children)

                                      Basically, I tip camgirls like I tip bartenders.

                                      Bartenders don’t like you very much, do they?

                                      [–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (1 child)

                                      i don't like them either

                                      [–]runhaterand 12 points13 points  (0 children)

                                      You best watch yourself. We're wanted men. I have the death sentence on 12 systems.

                                      [–][deleted]  (20 children)

                                      [deleted]

                                        [–]aalambBane 17 points18 points  (0 children)

                                        It's weird to me as well, and I'm purely speculating here, but I'd guess it isn't a porn addiction thing, but a loneliness/intimacy thing. I could see it basically being a surrogate for spending time with a girlfriend for a lonely guy... Interacting occasionally with an attractive woman, with a somewhat sexual atmosphere to it. I could see that potentially being a source of comfort.

                                        [–]thesethingshappenl 83 points84 points  (13 children)

                                        That's porn addiction. That guy comes off a little weird because he tries to play it like it's perfectly normal for adults to have girls masturbating on display throughout the day, but porn addiction itself isn't so uncommon.

                                        [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (12 children)

                                        They don't masturbate in free shows.

                                        [–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (1 child)

                                        Plenty do. Plenty of the top ones on there do too. Now there definitely has been a shift in the past few years though. Tons of cam people now save the real action for the ticket shows or private shows and everybody has the stupid tip-enhanced vibrator. I personally don’t think that that business model is going to last forever though. But there are still a lot that just do it after the goal is net.

                                        [–][deleted]  (8 children)

                                        [deleted]

                                          [–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (1 child)

                                          Often times in the free chat the girls just talk about their day, shit like that.. Most don't even get naked, doenst seem super weird to me but I can see how you would think so

                                          [–]greentintedlenses 2 points3 points  (5 children)

                                          'A hole' lot sadder. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). It's whole, btw - I see you did that twice :)

                                          [–][deleted]  (4 children)

                                          [deleted]

                                            [–]greentintedlenses 6 points7 points  (3 children)

                                            First time I've done this. Found it funny you said a hole on a thread about people who stare at a holes online. Then you misspelled it twice, figure you would want to know you were spelling it wrong. Have a good Christmas mate

                                            [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                                            Yes they do.

                                            [–]kobibeef 5 points6 points  (4 children)

                                            Not OP and also not a dude but you had one of the most well-written out responses so I wanted to ask

                                            I can't really relate too much because I don't watch these types of shows, but I was pretty surprised by the amount of people who found this strange or alarming. Because in my mind, I didn't find it that odd. I sort of thought of OP treating it akin to watching a Twitch stream?

                                            I don't use Twitch much either : P but I know that there's a lot of IRL channels where you can watch people cook or eat or just go on the computer and talk about whatever. And I know some of these streams last hours long and there's always people watching.

                                            Would it not be the same thing? Just on a different website

                                            I could imagine being in his shoes and was just surprised by the amount of backlash.

                                            [–][deleted]  (1 child)

                                            [deleted]

                                              [–]kobibeef 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                                              Thank you for the response! :)

                                              [–]Geopatra1 4 points5 points  (1 child)

                                              I agree with you, I don't find it strange at all. I'm a woman and barely even watch porn, but I understand wanting to have background noise while working on other stuff. And tbh it sounds kind of... nice? To have a live person there. I don't think he needs to get help like some of these prudes are saying lol.

                                              [–]kobibeef 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                              Yes thank you! I feel better knowing I'm not the only one who feels this way haha

                                              [–][deleted] 389 points390 points  (11 children)

                                              Can anyone else agree this is odd behavior?

                                              [–]stasiek01Male 89 points90 points  (0 children)

                                              I agree.

                                              [–]BertRenolds 42 points43 points  (6 children)

                                              Different strokes

                                              [–]brybrythekickassguy 53 points54 points  (3 children)

                                              It sounds more like constant strokes to me

                                              [–]BertRenolds 10 points11 points  (0 children)

                                              good to switch it up.

                                              [–]doesnotanswerdms 8 points9 points  (1 child)

                                              No, he just watches cam shows when he's gaming and tunes-out the sex. He strokes it later to porn. Like a normal person. Did you not read his post?

                                              [–]brybrythekickassguy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                                              normal person

                                              [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                              Literally

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                                                [–]MrMehawkMale 12 points13 points  (0 children)

                                                It's very odd behavior but he's ultimately not harming anyone, so who cares.

                                                [–]fgdadfgfdgadf 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                Not really, sounds like r/controlablewebcams xxx

                                                [–]Sweetness521 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                Why is it odd? It seems like he is just listening to real time conversations?

                                                [–]Actual_murderer 92 points93 points  (7 children)

                                                Wtf why not listen to a podcast or something that's weird as hell

                                                [–]babystripperMale 64 points65 points  (2 children)

                                                Because they have a porn addiction

                                                [–]passwordgoeshere 16 points17 points  (1 child)

                                                From now on, while listening to podcasts, I will pretend that all the guests are undressing and playing with vibrators.

                                                [–]TheSweetestScrotum 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                UNZIIIIIIIP RECRUITAAAAAA

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                                                  [–]Yavin4RedditLate 30s Male On Nitro 7 points8 points  (1 child)

                                                  Do you interact in the chatrooms or are mostly just afk despite showing as a premium in the room?

                                                  [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                  I am not the person you are asking but I afk a good bit as a premium, however a lot of the girls will ban you if you are premium and don't pay them anything for awhile.

                                                  [–]froughtyMan Child 21 points22 points  (2 children)

                                                  Just out of curiosity, what are the interactions with women you encounter in real life like? I gotta imagine that 24/7 exposure to this stuff has an effect on your perceptions. Kinda like living in this permanent altered reality. Do you date?

                                                  [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                                                  Not op, but I have a fully functioning life with a well paid job and am advancing my career. I date, breathe, etc. If anything it has made me feel less taboo about nudity and my sexuality.

                                                  I am not autistic so I don't have any issue partitioning my brain away from sexual thoughts or feelings while talking to a woman in person.

                                                  A lot of these girls genuinely like just being naked and talking to people online, and it's a bonus that they can make a nice living off it.

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                                                    [–]Chimpsix 50 points51 points  (0 children)

                                                    seek help

                                                    [–]uknowme6969 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                    i do this also just for pure entertainment and I have no porn addiction. It's like running a tv show or movie in the background except its enticing.

                                                    [–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (84 children)

                                                    Theres nothing wrong with this, I dont understand why youre getting so much hate

                                                    [–]concretador 14 points15 points  (0 children)

                                                    It does come off as a bit strange initially, but people are ridiculous to immediately start telling him he needs help. Someone in the comment thread asked, even if he does have a porn addiction, why should we care? Obviously comparing it to meth doesn’t really make sense, HOWEVER, is it wrong to care?

                                                    What if he DOES have a porn addiction and it is affecting his daily life in some way? Maybe he hasn’t realized his habits are out of the ordinary. People mentioning that his behavior MIGHT not be healthy I think is positive, but people like to make suggestions like angsty 13 year olds for some reason.

                                                    In summary, I think it’s good if we can all try to look out for each other - to tell OP he might want to do some self-reflection about if this is POSSIBLY unhealthy behavior. But not act like friggin senseless hyenas in doing so.

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                                                        [–]DJTLaCMale 18 points19 points  (10 children)

                                                        I used to be into it years ago. Something about it being live and happening in that moment was a turn on. It was also a bit of seeing something I wasn't supposed to in a way.

                                                        Since then I've changed from getting off to it to just enjoying time with friends. I have a good handful of friends who cam on both MyFreeCams and Chaturbate. I'll just hang out in their chats and talk to them while other dudes come and go tipping them for things.

                                                        For those who don't get it, i'd suggest visiting some of the top rooms on MFC. Some of those girls work their asses off and have actually created pretty dope communities. I have a couple friends I'd personally recommend but I'd feel weird posting their links publicly. They're NOTHING like the typical eastern-euro models who just sit there waiting for their ohmibods or lovense things to go off so they can pretend to have a seizure from a vibration weaker than an xbox controller.

                                                        [–]SlowbeardiusOfBeard 17 points18 points  (2 children)

                                                        Can you explain what you mean by a "dope community"?

                                                        I guess I might just be old and cynical, but however they dress it up to me it just seems like girls grooming lonely guys out of extraordinary sums of money for very little pay-off.

                                                        I'm honestly confused about what is evidently a huge sector of the internet, that I don't understand.

                                                        I wish I could remember the name of it but I watched a documentary about cam girls earlier this year and it was one of the most depressing things I've seen in a long time. It culminated in a guy paying for an American camgirl (who had a boyfriend) to visit Australia which ended up being tragically awkward.

                                                        [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                        The only experience I have with cam girls was some guy trying to get a friend of mine into recruiting girls to do his cam shows when she was hard up for money. He had rooms set up for them to work out of and took a cut of what they made. I'm sure not all cam girls work like that, but it seems somewhat exploitative on both ends of the camera.

                                                        [–]DJTLaCMale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                        A lot of the women I'm friends with have regulars in their chat (including myself) We'll chat about different stuff all the time, develop inside jokes. If you're familiar with Twitch, Stickam, Ustream, or any other live streaming service that's existed in the past couple years, it's not very different than that.

                                                        [–]WhatDoWithMyFeet 6 points7 points  (3 children)

                                                        Does it not feel weird that the basis of your friendship is monetary transactions?

                                                        [–]DJTLaCMale 1 point2 points  (2 children)

                                                        It's not. Most of the friends I have who cam, I've either met them through other friends OR I helped them learn the ropes when they were new models. I rarely ever tip them and if I do, it's not in exchange for anything sexual. I just do it to surprise them.

                                                        [–]WhatDoWithMyFeet 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                                                        How do you meet so many new camgirls as friends though? Are you friend with sex traffickers?

                                                        It's still a bit weird to me watching your friend get naked and masturbate as a form of hanging out. I prefer just drinks.

                                                        [–]DJTLaCMale 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                        I imagine it could sound like that with how vague I am but no, absolutely not. lol

                                                        The first cam model friend I made was through Twitter. A "normal" friend of mine thought she was hot and retweeted her. I noticed she played League Of Legends and followed her because of that. We ended up talking and decided to play together. Through her, I met another girl who had just recently stopped camming. Most of the ones I have now are simply because of random connections or networking. I think I remember how I met each one but I won't bore you with all of that (Unless you're legitimately curious)

                                                        As far as it being weird, it can be sometimes. If I'm in a friends chat and they start fingering themselves or anything similar, I usually just get quiet because I don't want to interrupt or distract any of the guys who are legitimately there for that kind of thing. I don't really feel weird seeing them do that or being there but being quiet during it makes me feel awkward.

                                                        Over the years, I've established a pretty good disconnect. A human body isn't really sexual to me unless it's in the proper context. I love seeing a naked girl as much as the next dude but unless it's for/with me, I don't get turned on.

                                                        [–]turningsteel 9 points10 points  (2 children)

                                                        If you have to pay them, they arent your friends man.

                                                        [–]thefalseidolVery Good Boy 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                                                        I think what you're seeing is the entertainment industry at the micro-scale. How many people (let's be real, men), AROUND THE WORLD, would it take to make your daily wage? Even if they just paid a buck? A FT job at 20 USD/hour is still less than 200 dollars/day, BEFORE TAXES (though depending on her country, that might still be an issue). Point being, taking a little bit of money from a large group of people is a pretty effective business model. Tax/no tax, if you could get 200 people around the world to pay 1 dollar, that's well above the median wage in America.

                                                        I know you asked about the guys, I just wanted to emphasize the point that there are all kinds of kinks ranging from basic to batshit, and even the batshit ones probably have at least 200 people in the whole world who would pay 1$/day to masturbate. You have to remember that whatever the shit is that knocks you on your ass, is what somebody else has for seeing her masturbating.

                                                        We know that plenty of people like solo videos, that's not too out there. So imagine that was your FAVORITE style, wouldn't it be kinda cool to pay 1/5/10/20 dollars every once and a while and try to get something that matches your oeuvre to a tee?

                                                        And as mentioned in the top comment, I think many of them are emotionally starved for affection, and it starts to not seem so crazyto pay a little extra (ever shopped hungry?). I've also recently learned about the Indian Man Problem (my caps, but its a thing even if there isn't an official title), and to be clear, this probably exists beyond JUST India, but because of their massive population, it is who this kind of behavior is mostly associated with. To make a long story longer, basically, there is huge sexual repression in India, coupled with areas outside of New Delhi or Mumbai have been quite isolated until relatively recently, not quite having the same established boundaries between themselves, their computers, and the women they interact with. If premarital sex is off the table in your culture, than talking to a cam girl starts to make a lot more sense as a stopgap.

                                                        [–]youmeanwhatnow 10 points11 points  (4 children)

                                                        Well I watched camguys, so I don’t know if I count. But I started dating a guy from chaturbate, been 9 months now and going pretty damn good I’d say.

                                                        Results may vary.

                                                        [–]iamamonsterprobably 7 points8 points  (3 children)

                                                        wow, that's....a interesting way to pick up a person to date. I'm curious, i want to know more, how did this happen?

                                                        [–]youmeanwhatnow 18 points19 points  (2 children)

                                                        Totally unintentional. I was just chatting with him and we got along. It said he was in the same area I was in. So I asked where he was exactly and to my surprise he basically just said well why don’t you come over? Perhaps a couple things to note, I’ve got a bit of a thing for older guys. So it’s not like it’s raining down older gay guys. And not as many people wanting an older guy so I’m sure he’s not quite as used to getting hit on, especially by someone so close. So one thing lead to another and we’re still dating, live together, and all around having a blast.

                                                        [–]iamamonsterprobably 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                                                        Wow, that is awesome. That's the sweetest thing i've read in a while, good for you!

                                                        [–]Anub-arak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                        This was very pleasant to read in this thread. I'm happy for you two!

                                                        [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                        My partner and I do porn and love shows so maybe I can chime in. Most of our content is really niche fetish stuff that people can't find elsewhere, however a lot of people are also in it for the personalized experience. For cam sites you have to have a pretty big following to make good money so with those girls there's an element of celebrity too and the guys paying them feel special getting to interact with someone with that status.

                                                        [–]PizzaWithKetchupMale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                        So many sites with high quality videos for free. What is so enjoyable about a mediocre person doing it from home?

                                                        [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                        Now I like camgirls, and I’ve never had a problem with women and I’m not shy or a shut-in or anything like that.

                                                        For me regular porn can be really fake and it’s almost always the same thing over and over. With cams it’s different, every day there are different goals and you get to see a bit more of the personality of the girls, which I think is kinda nice. I also don’t pay for anything on cam sites, so you can get your nut without paying a dime, contrary to what most people believe.

                                                        [–]Haohra 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                                                        I'm tryna beat my meat mane

                                                        [–]falcon4287Male 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                                                        I watched cam girls for a long time just in the hopes that I would eventually stumble across someone I knew. Then I did. And thank goodness it wasn't a relative.

                                                        After that, I considered myself to have won, and stopped watching cam girls.

                                                        [–]TheDukeofArgyll 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                                                        Everyone is different. Some like it and some don't, it just how humans are.

                                                        [–]ProjectInfinity 4 points5 points  (0 children)

                                                        I'm a developer in the livecam industry and during The European Summit in Sitges March this year I had the opportunity to talk to one of the most successful independent model in the industry LittleRedBunny.

                                                        From what she told me I clearly understood a lot of the guys out there that do talk to girls on cam and usually pays them for private sessions. The most common was horny men like expected but a large amount of her frequent customers were lonely men who didn't really need sexual interaction but instead social interaction. They had nowhere to turn and she genuinely forged a friendship between herself and these lonely guys. Granted they were paying money, but she truly cares about them and learns things about them. It is in of itself a form of friendship despite the fact they are paying for the privilege.

                                                        Hope this helps a bit. It varies drastically from site to site, Chaturbate has a lot more horny people on it than lonely people for sure but Chaturbate has communities like Twitch.tv would have. People tune in to "hang out" with the model.

                                                        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                        I guess you could ask the same about striptease. What's the point? You don't get to touch or ram your dick into anything, except the bouncer's boot when you do touch the stripper.

                                                        [–]falsevillain 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                                                        Cam sites are so popular because people love live couples or live girls that actually respond to what you pay for. If you want to see a girl masturbate on camera, all you have to do is pay enough money. Sure, you lose a little money, but you have this power over someone as you control their pleasure without much effort.

                                                        And if you manage to pay for a private show, it's a million times more intimate. Everyone loves intimacy.

                                                        [–]theCHAMPdotcom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                                                        This is definitely weird

                                                        [–]Brocerystore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                                                        It's like a strip club, that I don't have to go to and can see more dirty shit that I want to see. I pay, they perform. No hassle of trying to woo a girl to see the same shit, and less regret from a one night stand.

                                                        [–]billiondollardong 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                                                        I like the ones that are clearly not enjoying it but are very desperate, so they have to do the show anyway.

                                                        [–]kimchifreeze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                                                        I've been to cam sites before and while some of the girls are really hot, the experience was pretty boring to me, but then again, I don't think I ever really gave it a chance. Like I never really read chat and knowing what I know now, I feel like streamer-viewer interaction is what makes a stream*.

                                                        I say that because back then, I would "room surf" and occasionally, that would put me in a room with few to no viewers. No one talked in chat and as a result, the cam girl would just quietly stare into space or would look on her phone. It was really awkward and there was a really depressing feeling to it so obviously, I stayed for a few more minutes and it'd be more of the same.

                                                        As for why I watch Twitch (another streaming platform that's more gaming but does have IRL things), if I'm not watching esports, I'm just watching the same personalities I always watch. In a way, it's like going to a familiar pub. The atmosphere is nice and you know what to expect. I don't really actively watch them, but they make great background noise. Occasionally, I'd chime in and joke around with chat and the streamer. In really small streams with few to no viewers, it's sort of the same as with cam girls, but at least I can see them enjoying a video game.

                                                        [–]killingit12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                                                        Ex of mine was a cam girl. Lots of lonely people who more than anything wanted to talk to attractive girls. Her regulars were people who saw her as a friend and a few were her "sugar daddies" who had fuck loads of money but nothing to do with it, so they'd just buy her stuff and send it to her. Not tatty shit either, expensive purses and handbags were a regular as well as underwear. I felt sorry for them in a way.

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