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Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself Kindle Edition

4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 6,365 ratings

THE 10TH ANNIVERSARY EDITION WITH A NEW FOREWORD FROM KRISTIN NEFF

'Kristin Neff offers practical, wise guidance on the path of emotional healing and deep inner transformation.' Tara Brach, PhD, author of Radical Acceptance

Kristin Neff PhD, is a professor in educational psychology, and the world's expert on self-compassion. A pioneer who established self-compassion as a field of study, Kristin offers a powerful solution for combating negativity and insecurity - the symptoms of living in a high-pressure world.

Through tried and tested exercises and audio downloads, readers learn the 3 core components that will help to heal destructive emotional patterns so that you can become healthier, happier, and replace negative and destructive measures of self-worth and success with a kinder and non-judgemental approach.

Self-Compassion recognises that we all have weaknesses and limitations, but in accepting this we can discover new ways to achieve improved self-confidence, contentment and reach our highest potential. Simply, easily and compassionately. Kristin Neff's expert and practical advice offers a completely new set of personal development tools that will benefit everyone.

'A portable friend to all readers ... who need to learn that the Golden Rule works only if it's reversible: We must learn to treat ourselves as well as we wish to treat others.' Gloria Steinem

'A beautiful book that helps us all see the way to cure the world - one person at a time - starting with yourself. Read it and start the journey.' Rosie O'Donnell

Popular Highlights in this book

Editorial Reviews

Review

“Neff’s compassionate tone makes Buddhist principles accessible, and exercises make them applicable in real life.” — Publishers Weekly

“A portable friend to all readers―especially but not only women―who need to learn that the Golden Rule works only if it’s reversible: We must learn to treat ourselves as well as we wish to treat others.” — Gloria Steinem

“A beautiful book that helps us all see the way to cure the world, one person at a time, starting with yourself. Read it and start the journey.” — Rosie O’Donnell, talk show host

“An original and doable blueprint for improving the quality of your life.” — Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi, author of Flow and Creativity

“Neff’s powerful research and her ability to explain how self-compassion affects our everyday lives makes this book a transformative read.” — Brené Brown, Ph.D., author of The Gifts of Imperfection

“This is an important book. Following its advice can free readers from the chains of self-criticism and replace them with the wings of self-encouragement.” — Steven Stosny, Ph.D., author of Love Without Hurt

“In this deeply personal, highly practical book, Kristin Neff moves the entire study of compassion forward.” — Sharon Salzberg, author of Lovingkindness and Real Happiness

“Drawing on a powerful blend of Western psychology and Eastern meditative strategies, Kristin Neff offers practical, wise guidance on the path of emotional healing and deep inner transformation.” — Tara Brach, Ph.D., author of Radical Acceptance

“This book and its courageous and compassionate author will become essential reading for all of us seeking inner peace and true, lasting happiness in our lives. Savor and enjoy!” — Daniel J. Siegel, M.D., author of Mindsight

“Brilliant! Self-compassion is a revolutionary new idea-a better idea-pioneered by the author, Kristin Neff, with profound implications for how to live our lives.” — Christopher K. Germer, Ph.D., author of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion

“Based on state-of-the-art research, Neff provides essential lessons for how to excel personally and professionally through self-compassion.” — Dr. Todd B. Kashdan, author of Curious? and Designing Positive Psychology

“This is an important book. Following its advice can free readers from the chains of self-criticism and replace them with the wings of self-encouragement.” — Steven Stosny, Ph.D., author of Love Without Hurt

“If you have a longing to relate to your inner life with authentic care, this book will show you how. Drawing on a powerful blend of Western psychology and Eastern meditative strategies, Kristin Neff offers practical, wise guidance on the path of emotional healing and deep inner transformation.” — Tara Brach, Ph.D., author of Radical Acceptance

From the Back Cover

The relentless pursuit of high self-esteem has become a virtual religion. Our ultracompetitive culture tells us we need to be constantly above average to feel good about ourselves, but there is always someone more attractive, successful, or intelligent than we are. And even when we do manage to grab hold of high self-esteem for a brief moment, we can't seem to keep it. Our sense of self-worth goes up and down like a Ping-Pong ball, rising and falling in lockstep with our latest success or failure.

Fortunately, there is an alternative to self-esteem that many experts believe is a better and more effective path to happiness: self-compassion. The research of Dr. Kristin Neff and other leading psychologists indicates that people who are compassionate toward their failings and imperfections experience greater well-being than those who repeatedly judge themselves. This book powerfully demonstrates why it's so important to be self-compassionate and give yourself the same caring support you'd give to a good friend.

Using solid empirical research, personal stories, practical exercises, and humor, Dr. Neff—the world's foremost expert on self-compassion—explains how to heal destructive emotional patterns so that you can be healthier, happier, and more effective.

Product details

  • ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0052RMNCE
  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Yellow Kite (July 7, 2011)
  • Publication date ‏ : ‎ July 7, 2011
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • File size ‏ : ‎ 3413 KB
  • Text-to-Speech ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Screen Reader ‏ : ‎ Supported
  • Enhanced typesetting ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • X-Ray ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Word Wise ‏ : ‎ Enabled
  • Sticky notes ‏ : ‎ On Kindle Scribe
  • Print length ‏ : ‎ 282 pages
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 6,365 ratings

About the author

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Kristin Neff
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Read more at www.self-compassion.org

Kristin got her Ph.D. in 1997 at UC Berkeley, studying moral development. She is currently an Associate Professor in Human Development at the University of Texas at Austin.

During Kristin's last year of graduate school she became interested in Buddhism, and has been practicing meditation in the Insight tradition ever since. While doing her post-doctoral work she decided to conduct research on self-compassion - a central construct in Buddhist psychology and one that had not yet been examined empirically. In addition to her pioneering research into self-compassion, she has developed an 8-week program to teach self-compassion skills. The program, co-created with her colleague Chris Germer, is called Mindful Self-Compassion.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
6,365 global ratings
Self Compassion by Kristin Neff
5 Stars
Self Compassion by Kristin Neff
Price wise it was super bargain. The book had sime writings but very acceptable. Thank you for this great help.
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Top reviews from the United States

Reviewed in the United States on January 15, 2014
For the past four months, I have been diligently practicing mindfulness and accepting my emotions, even showing compassion for emotions such as anger and fear. The approach of self-compassion complements mindfulness training (as taught by Jon Kabat-Zinn or Thich Nhat Hahn among others) very, very well indeed. In fact, it seems that our society cultivates the exact opposite, going hard on one's self and evaluating one's self in an overly critical manner is the norm. In practicing these principles, I have emerged from year long depression and anxiety to regain my life. These techniques have helped see the gift of my depression and anxiety. Through practicing the wisdom of self-compassion and mindfulness diligently I have begun to find true strength, beyond the complement-recognition-dependent limitations of self-esteem.

When did we stop being as understanding, compassionate, caring and loving to ourselves as we are to those we love dearly? How can we recharge ourselves after working so hard at our jobs and trying so very hard to do everything right? Our inner critic, it seems, is never satisfied and continues to find fault although we have long earned recognition. Apart from that we are as perfect as we were the day we were born - when did we stop seeing ourselves in that light? Herein lies the rub, for in neglecting, punishing and criticizing ourselves, we are compelled to try to fill this empty void through excessive consumption of food, products, relationships, attention-seeking. The result is catastrophic, despite rampant consumption and the destruction of the environment, depression and mental illness are on the rise! Our inner critic continues to devour any praise and complements our self-esteem gets - if we turn the tables as Kristen Neff suggests, the result is the kind of profound, lasting change we have been wanting all our lives and it is painfully simple! Each and every one of us deserves this.

Kristen Neff has done a very thorough job of presenting this invaluable wisdom as practiced, among other sources, in the Buddhist Tradition (it is also conveyed in many other faiths, philosophies etc.). She does so in a very human, humorous and enjoyable manner, which makes this book a true pleasure to read. If you are devoted to improving your life experience and that of those you love, please begin by accepting and loving yourself - flaws and all - then you can unleash your true power as a compassionate, loving, accepting being and genuinely help your loved ones, society and the world all in one. May the wisdom of this book help many to heal themselves, the rest will take care of itself.
19 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on December 30, 2023
Kristin Neff's book provides the perfect amount of fertilizer to nurture and grow and good life. Simple, easy, and so positive. Enjoyed the read and look forward to offering it and recommending to others.
4 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on April 23, 2024
Simply life changing. Based in scientific research, this book invites you to love yourself and the world.
Reviewed in the United States on March 10, 2023
Great book with activities throughout to help you work through and learn about self compassion and treating yourself with kindness. However, earning a 4 star due to Amazon's shipping method putting the book in a larger than necessary box with a hardcover book so that it arrived with several pages damaged defeating the purpose of purchasing a new copy.
8 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on April 5, 2024
Practical and insightful. Dr. Neff’s work is ground-breaking. If everyone read and applied this wisdom, we would have the resilience and capacity to live sane and joyful lives. Deep gratitude for this gift.
2 people found this helpful
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Reviewed in the United States on February 20, 2023
This is a gem of a book and one I desperately needed to read. I am so grateful to Dr. Neff for having the courage to be as honest and vulnerable as she was in order to live and then write about her own self compassion so it could be shared with others.

In my efforts to be the best I could be in so many areas of my life, I drove myself to attempt perfection mercilessly. A lot of that was inherited from my father and made worse by a demanding and unempathetic marriage partner.

Just in the first being kind to myself exercise, I began to experience the freedom and power of self compassion. It enabled me to see and accept that we all share many of the same experiences, make the same mistakes and even feel the same way about ourselves, which is why we need self compassion to begin with. I was no longer an island of failure, but a normal person, making normal mistakes and having normal feelings. Having worked with an excellent therapist for the last five years, I was able to add to my work on being present and mindful in and through the reality of what is.

The final chapter of Self Appreciation was the icing on the cake! Learning not only to accept myself when things aren't as I'd like, but to cultivate appreciating what is good and wonderful too. Truly, this is who I am - who we all are, "warts and all" as they say. I am so appreciative of this book and the life altering truth within it.

If six stars was an option, that would be my rating. Thank you Dr. Neff!
41 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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Meghan
5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent book
Reviewed in Canada on November 14, 2023
This book was recommended by a friend. The book explores elements of self compassion and how to incorporate those healthy behaviours into your life. I would recommend it to anyone who has a tendency to beat themselves up for their shortcomings.
Helen
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing book! Life changing!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 30, 2023
I’m half way through this book and I’ve highlighted so many pieces of wisdom & learning that I’ll be returning to again & again as part of my healing journey! For me personally, the timing of this book is key - I’m working with a therapist regarding childhood trauma & doing other growth work. This book alongside that is perfect for my healing journey. I would recommend this book to anyone who is their own worst critic and is open to being kinder to themselves and accepting to be human is to be flawed. Thank you Kristen Neff.
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Helen
5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing book! Life changing!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on October 30, 2023
I’m half way through this book and I’ve highlighted so many pieces of wisdom & learning that I’ll be returning to again & again as part of my healing journey! For me personally, the timing of this book is key - I’m working with a therapist regarding childhood trauma & doing other growth work. This book alongside that is perfect for my healing journey. I would recommend this book to anyone who is their own worst critic and is open to being kinder to themselves and accepting to be human is to be flawed. Thank you Kristen Neff.
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5 people found this helpful
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Client d'Amazon
5.0 out of 5 stars Parfait !
Reviewed in France on May 4, 2023
Livraison rapide ! Merci
Femme
5.0 out of 5 stars Great book
Reviewed in Mexico on March 18, 2019
Great book
Fabrizio Gaoni
5.0 out of 5 stars Libro che va in profondità
Reviewed in Italy on September 25, 2019
Ho voluto leggere questo libro della psicologa Kristin Neff in lingua originale e non me ne sono pentito.
La Neff ci accompagna con grande delicatezza nel mondo dell'empatia e del perdono verso se stessi, che si fonda su 3 pilastri: un atteggiamento consapevole verso il presente (mindfulness), gentilezza nei gesti e nelle parole usate con se stessi soprattutto nei momenti di difficoltà (kindness), senso di connessione con gli altri esseri umani quando sperimentiamo un limite o un fallimento (common humanity). Contiene esercizi che aiutano a praticare e ad interiorizzare questi atteggiamenti: a me sono stati molto utili.
4 people found this helpful
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